SDL Week 8

 Success Criteria:

I have proof-read my writing to ensure I have:

• Juicy sentence starters 

• Correct punctuation - Capital letters, full stops, commas, speech marks, exclamation and question marks.

• A speech conversation in the body of my writing

• A simile in the body of my writing

• Read my writing to ensure it makes sense.

14 September 2021

WALT:  Follow the sequence of Narrative writing 

Introduction

At 8:00am  in a dark gloomy forest two little birds got picked up by the wind. They were on a hard  mission  to find a new home surrounded by predators.  One is named mascot and the other is blaze. They flew for a couple hours then landed on a tall and strong tree not a dot of  light shining upon them. Mascot is black and white he is also as brave as a lion and blaze is red with a pinch of black and a white lightning bolt on his side. Blaze is as cute as a chiwawa. There are very dark clouds and a drop of water drops from the sky.

Problem

Mascot  saw a storm heading right for them. Blaze was just in the air looking at the scorching hot sun.  Blaze noticed a tornado coming in the other direction; they panicked so bad that blaze dropped to the ground. Waking up with a huge shadow towering over blaze reaching to grab him, then mascot swooped down and hit hunter Jack. Jack fell over and soon noticed the tornado.  Soon the tornado swept up Jack swinging him in a sphere.  

Mascot had an idea he said to go back home to his mothers place.  When they got there the house was nowhere to be seen.  Soon

the hunter's brother sprinting to crush Mascot and Blaze.  Mascot said to Blaze “Let's split up and try to find mother if we don't find her to meet right here”   Days passed and they still hadn’t seen their mother.  They heard a sudden movement in the black berry bush and a stoat  leapt out of the bush. Thorns went everywhere shooting into the ground. Mascot and Blaze were trapped but the hunter came and blocked the thorns from getting them. 

Self assessment

What I like about  my writing:

•   I like the characters names

•  I liked the speech conversations 

•  I like writing about the Hunter

What i need to do to improve my writing:

•  Write more 

•  Keep on track 

•  Don't talk to other people when I'm working

•  Add more descriptive words and  write juice sentences